So, I like to schedule out my days.
I don't know if this is a healthy way to approach life, taking the best advantage of the time I have been given, or if it's some bizarre neurosis.
It drives me nuts to not have a schedule.
The thought of "just winging it" makes me panic.
I am most miserable on days when there is no defined goal, no path to travel, just a flat and lazy existence. The thought of relaxing on the beach in Tahiti sounds fairly unpleasant.
My favorite days have been ones where I took a step back from the day, looked at the breadth of possiblities, examined their relative importance and then assembled them like multi-dimensional puzzle pieces. So many factors to consider, so many possible combinations and when it all fits, I get a rush of ownership. It's a beautiful thing.
Lately, life has been chaotic. What I would give for a bit of stability.